TLDNR"What hath God wrought

post from Poker on 02 September 2007 05:05:28 AM. © Poker

TLDNR

"What hath God wrought."

It's what I wished I'd been quick enough to say that night in Las Vegas.

I was in the seven seat and on the heater of my trip. It was one of those gorgeous nights where nothing goes wrong, aces hold up, draws get there, and the other players are either scared or vindictive enough to try to make moves.

The guy in the two seat was playing badly. He'd just come over from a different game and it was obvious he was playing on the last money in his pocket. He wore a hooded sweatshirt, a flat-billed cap, and a pair of dark shades.

He hadn't been sitting at the table for a full orbit and had yet to play a hand with me when he came in for a raise. I called in position and flopped open-ended. When he made his continuation bet, I made the call. He checked the turn and I checked behind. The river paired me and he checked again. This time I bet out. He scowled and folded, saying as he mucked his cards, "If I were you, I'd kill myself."

I was actually surprised at how speechless I was. I'd heard and read the same phrase before, but it had never been directed at me. If it was an attempt at tilting me, it was fruitless, as I was running well and in a good mood. If it was an attempt at bravado, whatever he gained was short-lived. He busted soon after and I never saw him again.

Still, I had no response. Yet, today, I still think about that guy, not because he was a good poker player, but because he didn't think twice about throwing out a line like that after playing his hand the way he did and losing.

I was me and I didn't want to kill myself. This guy, however, seemed pretty sure of himself.

And he's not alone.

***

Several months ago I spent a lot of time reading 2+2. While I got a lot of enjoyment and a sense of community from reading poker blogs, I felt like there were a lot of other voices and ideas in forum communities. I never posted on 2+2, but spent a lot of time lurking around the legislative and online poker forums.

One day, there was a particularly good post about the legal implications of the NETeller pull-out and what it meant for online poker players. It stretched down the page longer than the average forum post, but was insightful and I felt more educated for having read it.

The very next post in the thread spanned five letters: TLDNR.

I looked at the acronym and felt old. I had no idea what it meant. I checked in with Google and discovered the acronym stood for "Too long, did not read."

I sighed. A lost, illiterate soul, I figured. That was until I scrolled down further and found several people offering a heartfelt, "LOL" about the "TLDNR." I scrolled down a little more and found several people asking for a summary of the post.

Before long--much like seeing a new car for the first time and then seeing it eight times in the same day--I started seeing the same acronym and the same tired requests for summaries in posts all over 2+2.

It was not a lost, illiterate soul. It was a growing subculture that lived under a banner of "I don't have time for your shit. Either give it to me or get the fuck out of my way."

***

My work has offered me both the privilege of seeing some of the best things about poker and the sickness of seeing some of the worst. I've written in depth about the good things I've seen. Whether to protect my tenuous position in the industry or out of some hope I was wrong, I've never written much about the young guns.

I've been back from the World Series for a couple of weeks now and hoped it would be enough time to cool me off. Human Head might say it's given me time to get properly indignant, like a reformed smoker or drinker who spends hours telling you how you're killing yourself. I'm not sure either has happened. I'm not properly cool, nor am I indignant (even if I'm coming across as such). I'm just worried.

See, if you didn't know, "What hath God wrought" were the first words Samuel Morse sent across telegraph lines. It was a form of communication that required shorthand like SOS, 73 (best wishes), and 30 (the end). There was an economy of time based on how slow the new fast process was.

Once an indispensible form of communication, the Pony Express and other advanced systems of communication sent Morse shorthand the way of the dodo a long time ago. Now we live a century later and have more ways to communicate than we need. People like me like to think we've gained a lot more knowledge through technology. However, there are a lot of folks out there that may be suffering the opposite effect. Today, short-hand is not because of a literal lack of time. It's laziness and a feeling that our time is much better spent doing something other than actually communicating.

Now, you'd think this is the middle of a long rant about the kids refusing to read anything that takes more than five minutes to shove in their brain. However, it's not. The refusal to read is a mere symptom of a larger problem.

***

I need to preface the following with a pretty obvious statement. There are some damned good kids out there playing poker today. By that, I don't mean they are just good poker players. They are good people. The most obvious example is Jason Strasser. If you don't know him, look him up. The kid is ten years younger than I am and more mature by just as many. He knows his place in poker and he's finding his place in the world.

One night, he and I stood at the literal crossroads in the Amazon Room at the WSOP. We had a discussion that lasted longer than it should've based on how long he had during his tournament break. However, during that time, Strasser managed to reveal a lot about himself. Despite being wildly successful in poker, he's leaving the life for a while to try out a life on Wall Street. As we parted, he said something to the effect of, "I will still be able to play poker in three years. If I wait on Wall Street, I may miss that opportunity." Though Strasser has made more money in poker than he stands to make on Wall Street in his first year, he's looking for something else for a while.

Strasser is just one example. There are several other young guys out there who have made an honorable life for themselves in poker or businesses surrounding poker. Eric "Rizen" Lynch, Nat Arem, and Luca Pagano come to mind, as well as several others you likely have never heard of. However, for every one of the good kids, there seems to be five others who have fallen victim to the TLDNR culture.

Now, you might think this is a rail-job on poker. It's not, per se. I see it everywhere. It just so happens that most of the kids I meet, I meet at the poker tables.

Unlike naming the good kids above, I'm not going to call out names on the bad ones. If you're not part of the world, you wouldn't recognize the names anyway. If you are part of the world, you know who I'm talking about. But what am I talking about? I'm talking about a subsection of the 19-28 year olds who believe that they are entitled to whatever they can win, borrow, or steal. Their grasp on morality, etiquette, and the golden rule is as weak as their handshake. If there is a gray line, they are happy to cross it if they believe they can benefit from it financially. What's more, they feel more than entitled in doing so.

In most industries, these traits will get you fired, get you arrested, or turn you into a pariah fast enough. Only in the entertainment industry and poker can you be an immoral, egomaniacal kid and find quick success. And the success, it can get you high faster than any drug. I can't speak personally about the kind of success the kids are having these days, but there was a year or two when I was playing the biggest games online. When I was winning, I thought I was King fucking Kong. I discovered quickly enough that success can be fleeting. I figured it out before I went poker-broke, thankfully. Still, I know what winning feels like and, like Chris Rock says, "I understand."

I was fortunate enough to have a few things on which to fall back. I'm not sure that a lot of the younger folks do. Many of them are winning insane amounts of money right now. Many of them are buying $30,000 watches, $100,000 cars, and who knows what else.

I don't begrudge their winning. For their sake, I hope it continues. However, it might be good if they look around and see what guys just a few years their senior are in the middle of right now. Like, without naming names, one known pro standing on the rail at the WSOP and repeatedly pestering another known pro because the latter is into him for more than a hundred grand and refuses to pay back the money. Or another known pro who is well-known for his big cash play who is spending more time hawking a D-list energy drink at the WSOP than he is playing poker. Why? Well, you can guess the rumors. That's not even to mention the Vinnie Vinh and Eskimo Clark stories.

As you might imagine, though, I'm not writing this entirely out of an altruistic worry for the up-and-coming generation. I mean, really, as a poker player, I should be happy if these guys continue to play and refund the poker economy. My greater worry is this: in ten or fifteen years, if nothing changes, a majority of the poker world will be made up of the kind of people I'm talking about. They are people who don't think multi-accounting is wrong because other people do it. They are people who believe collusion is okay if they can get away with it. They are people who think it is okay to borrow money and disappear. They are the people who feel it is completely appropriate to write (a honest to goodness line from a poker forum), "I would have put up the money to abort you."

In a game that is so great on so many levels, they are the people who represent everything that's wrong with it. It would be different if they were dinosaurs we were sending out to pasture (pardon the mixed metaphor, but it sort of fit, I think). However, they're not. They are Generation Next.

Maybe my worry is unfounded. Maybe I just haven't met enough of the Jason Strassers and Eric Lynchs to make me believe it's all going to be okay. Over my few years in the business, I've put my faith in a few of the young guns. Out of four I honestly, truly believed in, two have held my faith and two have broken my heart. I'm tired of putting my money in on coin flips.

And, of course, I hope to be wrong. I hope the above is just the late-night ramblings of a guy who needs a serious break from everything. Poker has been so good to me and it's a game I hope to play for the rest of my life. I hope poker's success live and online will continue unabated for as long as any of us care to play. I simply hope that there are enough good people out there to keep an eye on a generation in which I've lost a lot of faith.

The thing about the poker world is that it lets anybody with money in. There is not a sign at the door, a test to take, a guaranteed mentor to follow, or a list of terms and conditions anybody has to sign. Even if there were, most of the people I'm talking about would just scroll to the bottom and sign their name without reading.

I figure I've run the risk of offending some folks with this post. I've nearly deleted it twice now. However, I finally decided that no one I'm talking about will have read far enough to see any of this.

And if they did, it will just have been to scroll down far enough to comment, "TLDNR."

Play Poker with Bart Simpson
Second Annual Monte Carlo Night

Bart Simpson & Nancy Cartwright

Want to play poker with Bart Simpson? Want to help a worthy cause while hanging out with some Hollywood movers and shakers? Want to sit next to a well known poker star? If you answered yes to any of the above questions then read on because I have exactly the deal for you; but, poker tournament seating is limited. For Tickets, registration, and information call 1.818.882.7336, or click to the website for details and an online registration form.

The Second Annual Monte Carlo Night hosted by Nancy Cartwright, mouthpiece of Bart Simpson, is scheduled for Saturday, September 29 at 5:30 PM. FYI Nancy is not Bart's lawyer, she is his voice. This yearly charity event raises money for the Devonshire Police Activities League Supporters (PALS) and this year the money will be used to build a Youth Center for at-risk children. There will be games, a live auction, drawings, and a No-Limit Hold'em Poker Tournament.

All photos with this post were shot at the 2007 WSOP and are of players that have expressed an intererst in playing in the PALS poker tournament. More pics and details after the jump...

2007 WSOP Main Event on ESPN Tuesday
photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com
2007 World Series of Poker

A few of the 1,284 players that showed up for Day 1A of the 2007 WSOP Main Event

Tuesday night we get the first two hour installment of eight weekly sessions covering the 2007 WSOP Event #55, the big one, the really big one, the $10,000 final No-Limit Hold'em Tournament to determine the 2007 WSOP World Champion. That's right, sixteen hours of big time poker bliss delivered to you in the comfort of your home through the magic of television. This week we relive all the drama and excitement of Day 1A. Cards flying across the felt of more than 10 dozen poker tables to hundreds of players all dreaming of taking home the $8,250,000 in cash and that bracelet.

Some thoughts on mortal danger

I'm late to this discussion and it's no longer news. As Otis posted below, one of our underground G-Vegas games was robbed at gunpoint this week. BadBlood has already posted his reaction and Eddie the dealer, who was there at the time, has a full account of what actually happened.

Now I'd like to weigh in.

DOPES

Back in college I had a lot of friends who smoked pot. For the purposes of this public forum we'll assume that I never joined them. That said, most of these folks approached their federally controlled substance with the same cavalier attitude as our undergroud gamblers.

For most, it began as something top secret, something so hush hush, in high school. Parents would have been mortified and with teachers and coaches, not to mention police, all hovering in the periphery there was always a danger. Maybe the danger was part of the attraction.

Before long the drugs became more casual. Pot smokers surround themselves with pot smokers. It becomes an insulated culture. So insulated that they hardly know any friends who don't smoke dope. I remember clearly those friends who would say, "everyone gets high," and they'd say it with conviction.

Clearly, of course, everyone does NOT get high. Still, within a few years the same kids who were sneaking a single joint by their parents are puffing cigar shaped spliffs behind the wheel of a car loaded with a half pound of grass. As one danger grows more comfortable, and thus is negated, they push the limit further.

BACK IN THE DAY

The first time Otis and I played at TheMark's house we caught a sorta edgy vibe. We'd brought 8 beers in a 12 pack we'd just opened and got there before anyone else, even before the host. So back behind Mark's place we met the tennants who live in the apartments he lets out. They were....odd. Nothing wrong with them really, just odd.

Otis and I had an emergency code word for when we knew it was time to bail. We figured any mention of our friend "Jerry" was clue enough to hit the road. Within five minutes, one of us asked the other, "So, I wonder how Jerry is tonight?"

I think we meant it as a nervous inside joke. The intent is lost to time.

Later Otis began repeating another nervous joke every time he grew uncomfortable, "Why don't you just take me out back and stab me?"

Again, I THINK it was a joke.

Of course, I now consider TheMark a friend, and only occasionally think he's planning to stab me.

RAISING THE STAKES

At one point, early this year before mky work schedule changed, I'd play as many as 5 times a week. The Spring Hotel, The Gaelic Game, The Black Stallion, and The Depot as familiar to me as rooms in my own home.

Here's what I take :

$500 - $1000
iPod
Super Awesome Cool Shades
Wingman
Credibility
Ability to support my Family
My Good Name

I remember when I first went to the Spring Hotel, I was jumpy about police. I realize how silly that is, but every time someone came in through that back door I wondered if it was time for a ticket. Granted, it's just a citation, but it would also mean I'd lose my job.

Believe it or not, a good poker bust could put me out of work.

Over time, I stopped worrying. I remember getting these mass e-mails about the Gaelic game's big Saturday tournaments and thinking "That's nuts...they'll get busted!!"

Not long after that I was a regular at the tables.

One night, at the Gaelic game, Otis cornered me as I walked in. "I think that guy is a deputy," he said. I freaked out.

Turns out the guy was a FORMER deputy. But I still as a little tense. So much at stake and all.

I think the robbery fear really popped up a few weeks ago. One of the local games flirted with the idea of mixing a $25/$50NL game in with the other tables one night. I thought it was a terrible idea. With a MINIMUM allowed buying of $5000 that means a MINIMUM of $50,000 in untraceable, unreported, and unguarded money at a full table. What crook wouldn't want a piece? Plus, remember the victims almost certainly won't report the crime.

Luckily, the host of that game thought better of the very high stakes game. That was about a week before the armed robbery at the Black Stallion game.

Also lucky, everyone at the Black Stallion game made it out ok, if a little lighter in the wallet.

Still, I was particularly taken aback by this part of Eddie's post :

"Make no mistake dear readers, I am very pro-gun. I believe in freedom. I believe in what this country was founded on and I believe in our right to defend ourselves, our families, our friends, and any other innocent person who's life might be in danger. Had Queen not been in the picture last night I may have reacted differently. If she wasn't there and I had been armed, I'm pretty sure I would have acted differently"

I think Eddie is a smart guy. But my sigle biggest fear is not a police bust and not a robbery, it's a guy pointing a gun at a robber with a gun.

I can't handle that risk.

I think if I've learned anything from poker it's the right time to call and the right time to fold.

What are the odds of a bust or robbery?

Check the EV.

If I expect to make, say, $300 from a typical underground $1/$2NL game...and my earnings as a media type in the next year are X....do the odds match up?

I don't know. I'm just not sure.

I'm taking a break, for now, from underground games...while I think it over.

And, for the first time in a long time, I appreciate the risk.

IMEGA vs UIGEA...Good vs Evil?
photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com

Mr. Poker

Note: All of the Flipchip Photos with this post were taken of people playing poker for money legally at the 2007 World Series of Poker.

"The purpose of UIGEA is to prevent Americans from engaging in their fundamental rights to conduct their lives in the manner they wish to live it, to be free from the Government imposing public morality in the privacy of one's home." - Eric Bernstein, attorney for IMEGA.

On Tuesday, the US District Court of New Jersey granted the US Department of Justice (DoJ) a motion to allow more time in their response to charges brought by Interactive Media Entertainment and Gaming Association (IMEGA). DoJ and its co-defendants including US Attorney General Albert Gonzales, the Federal Trade Commission, and the Federal Reserve Board of Governors now have until September 4th to reply to the charges IMEGA has filed against them. IMEGA has sued for a judgment for a temporary restraining order to prevent enforcement of the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act (UIGEA). UIGEA was passed into law last year and prevents US based financial institutions from processing payments to online gaming businesses under civil and criminal penalties including doing prison time.

Poker Room Review Rio All Suite Hotel & Casino
photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com
Las Vegas Rio All-Suite Hotel & Casino Poker Room Review

Rio All Suite Hotel & Casino

When the Rio opened in 1991 it instantly became the party place for the young hip crowd. Loud music, sexy dancing girls' riding light floats high above the casino floor, even a Rio Rita showgirl host and a Carnivale atmosphere. that will turn even the hardcore grouch into a smiling mover and shaker. Today's Rio Resort continues to cater to the young party crowd while pleasing the more mature guest.

Neteller UPDATE

Updated with important NETeller release form information below
Updated AGAIN with even more important information below

Just got this e-mail from Neteller:

"The NETELLER Plc Group has announced that the distribution of funds to its US members will begin on July 30, 2007.

You are receiving this e-mail because our records reflect that you are a US member who may request funds from NETELLER. As of July 30, you will be able to make a request for funds on NETELLERÂ’s website by signing in to your account. In the meantime, you should visit our online FAQs for more information about the distribution plan.

Please note that US members will not be able to request funds from the NETELLER website after January 26, 2008.

NETELLER Plc Group"

THERE'S MORE!

When I logged in they asked me to sign this release before releasing my funds:

"Release

You and NETELLER Plc Group (each, a "Releasing Party") mutually release, waive, and discharge each other (each, a "Released Party") from any and all manner of actions, causes of action, suits, promises, damages, judgments, executions, claims, counterclaims, demands, and any other form of liability whatsoever, in law or equity, known or unknown, that the Releasing Party ever had, now has, or hereafter can, shall, or may have against the Released Party from the date You opened Your Account to the Effective Date with respect to Your request to receive funds under the Distribution Plan and Your Account.

The additional definitions below apply to this release:

"You" or "Your" refers to you and any of your assigns, heirs, executors, agents, or anyone else acting on your behalf or in your capacity.

"NETELLER Plc Group" means NETELLER plc and its predecessors, successors, present and former affiliated companies, subsidiaries, assigns, officers, directors, stockholders, employees, and agents.

"Your Account" means your online stored value account with the Neteller plc Group, or any of them, which holds electronic money.

"Distribution Plan" means the distribution plan announced by NETELLER Plc Group on 4 June 2007 pursuant to agreements with the United States AttorneyÂ’s Office for the Southern District of New York and Navigant Consulting, Inc.

"Effective Date" means the date on which You successfully withdraw funds from Your Account under the Distribution Plan."

Update: Note this first. We ain't lawyers. However, after reading over the waiver and the writings of people smarter than us, it appears the NETeller release is a sort of sly attempt on NETeller's part to get as many of us as possible to sign-off on not suing them for breaking the Terms of Service to which we all agreed when we signed up for an account. In short, they know they are breaking the terms of service and that any of us could try to sue them.

You should know that you do not have to sign this waiver to get your money. You can deny acceptance of the waiver, move on to the next step, and withdraw your money.

By signing the waiver, you are basically giving up your right to sue NETeller at a later date. In exchange, NETeller is agreeing to not sue you at a later date. I'm not sure how many people have to worry about NETeller suing them. I'd guess the answer is none, but who knows. If you think NETeller is going to sue you for something, sign the waiver and be happy that you're getting the money. For what it is worth, I didn't sign the release and my transfer (for no small sum of money) seemed to go through just fine. I don't plan on suing NETeller for anything, but I didn't see any reason to sign off on anything when it wasn't necessary to get my money. I probably will talk bad about NETeller at cocktail parties, but litigation seems ike a fruitless endeavor.

Also, for what it is worth, I didn't receive the e-mail G-Rob mentioned above. However, as I've been waiting for this day for six months, I was sort of eager and went straight to NETeller on my own. --Otis

Update #2: How could this update be more important than the ones that came before it? Well how about this? My money--every last dollar and penny of it--hit my back account in less than 24 hours. The case may not be closed, but I'm done thinking about it. I think my wife needs a new kitchen. --Otis

Dear Comment Spammer,

I'm in dire need of Viagra because I have trouble with my penis. Sometimes I wonder, "Hey, self, is there any way to get a supply of viagra for my penis from a mexican phamacy?"

God I hope so.

The truth, comment spammer, is I hate you very much.

Now, don't get me wrong, I need the encouragement you offer with fine comments like, "Great site!" or "Nice Post!" or my personal favorite, "This is a fine post please see my site for great prices on Rogaine!!"

Really, who doesn't like a pat on the ol' back?

Still, I don't need your drugs.

I need people who actually care about poker or, barring that, care about useless rambling from the guy who simply puts posts on the web while waiting for another Otis update.

At the very least, I look at your site clogging garbage as a sort of online bad beat.

Even the very best of us get tired of that.

In short, comment spammer, Go fuck yourself.

Byron Liggett Dies
photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com

Byron Liggett
1944 - 2007

Byron Liggett passed away last Monday at his home in Reno. Byron was best noted for his incredible store of gambling history knowledge which he readily shared with the world. He was a perpetual writing machine having been published in many magazines, books and newspapers over the years. He was a popular writer for Poker Player Newspaper where he shared his love of the game in his regular column, North By Northwest.

A long time resident of Reno, Nevada, Byron was usually found on the road covering major poker events, most recently for the Heartland Poker Tour. All of us at LasVegasVegas.com will surely miss his big smile, quick wit, great stories and friendship.

Labor Day Weekend = Jerry Lewis MDA Telethon
photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com
Jerry Lewis MDA Telethon 2007

South Point Hotel & Casino is the Las Vegas home for the Jerry Lewis MDA Labor Day Telethon

Las Vegas local, Jerry Lewis, will be making his 42nd consecutive appearance as host of the Labor Day MDA Telethon. The twenty one and a half hour live broadcast will be beamed to almost two hundred TV stations around the country from the South Point Hotel, Casino & Spa on the south Las Vegas strip. Jerry Lewis will be joined at the entertainment extravaganza by his long time sidekick, Ed Mahon. Hundreds of entertainers will be featured from around the country.

photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com
Jerry Lewis MDA Telethon 2007 The South Point Hotel & Casino sign welcomes Jerry Lewis. Yes, I know the dates on the sign are wrong

For those lucky people that get to spend Labor Day weekend in Las Vegas you're invited to become part of the South Point TV Audience. Free tickets to the show are provided on a rotating basis beginning Sunday, September 02 at 5:30 AM and continuing until Monday, September 03 at 1:30 PM. After driving down to the south most Las Vegas casino try the South point poker room, read the South Point Poker Room Review here.

photo by flipchip/lasvegasvegas.com
Jerry Lewis MDA Telethon 2007 South Point Hotel & Casino

Bodog Fight Challenge Poker Tournament Series
Photo Courtesy of Bodog

Looking for new fish to fry or a new twist in online poker tournaments? Check out the Bodog Fight Challenge Poker Tournament Series. Open to all Bodog Fight fans and poker enthusiasts alike, this unique online poker tournament series pits you against Bodog's roster of Bodog Fighters each month in the Bodog Poker Room. You earn points and work your way up the tournament leader board for a spot in the final tournament for your chance to win a Bodog Fight Challenge prize package worth $5,000.

Monthly Prizes:

1st place - autographed gloves by Matt Lindland

2nd place - Bodog Poker Chip set

3rd place - Bodog Fight swag bag

4th-6th place - TC$29 Tournament Credits

Final Tournament Prizes:

Grand Prize - Trip for 2 and tickets to a Bodog Fight or Bodog sponsored event and Bodog Fight swag worth $5,000

2nd place - Plasma TV

3rd place - Custom Bodog Poker table

4th-5th place - Bodog Fight gloves autographed by Matt Lindland and Bodog Poker chip set

For the Bodog Fight Challenge Poker Tournament Series schedule, tournament leader board and tournament series information, visit the Bodog Fight Challenge Poker Tournament Series website.

EPT Barcelona: Final day
It all ends tomorrow (Saturday) and here are the men in with a shout:

Nikolaus Jedlicka (Austria) 879,000
Mika Paasonen (Finland) 715,000
Sander Lylloff (Denmark) 646,000
Juan Maceiras (Spain) 585,000
Mark Teltscher (UK) 533,000
Adam Junglen (USA) 419,000
Tronde Eidsvig (Norway) 339,000
Mohamad Kowssarie (Sweden) 294,000
Patrick Bruel (France) 270,000
Voitto Rintala (Finland) 253,000
Davidi Kitai (Belgium) 219,000
Greg Dyer (USA) 155,000
Philip Yeh (Sweden) 116,000

Full coverage begins at 3
$20,000 Tournament Buy-in

Read The Full Article:
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/Poker/~3/151191807/party-poker-supply.php

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TLDNR"What hath God wrought

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